I seem to have been doing a little bit of freaking out lately - I don't enjoy it, really, I don't. Does anyone?
The wedding is now 41 days away and getting closer every second and every now and then I feel like I just can't breathe, like there is no oxygen for me in the world. I keep telling people that I am stressed out etc and they all go 'oh nerves huh?'
No, not nerves, just pure stress.
I can't wait to marry Simon, I am so looking forward to being married to him. It's the wedding I am getting stressed about, not the marriage - the two are completely separate beasts, and quite frankly I would much rather be excited about our marriage than excited about the wedding, I feel a little bit worried about those people who focus so much on that one day when really it's about the rest of your lives, together, as husband and wife. I don't want to spend thousands of dollars more than I can actually afford so that we have an amazing day, the thing that will make it amazing is the fact that we are getting married and we are celebrating our love with all these people who love us.
I have been freaking out about just how many people are actually saying yes to our invitations, I am freaking out about where the hell we are going to put them all, about the fact that we now don't have enough crockery etc at the venue and I'll have to hire more in, about whether I will have enough seats in the end, all of this has been weighing on me and I wished for many things, including a way to have everyone there and yet somehow being able to morph them into half as many people, lol would you mind if i just blended you with someone else for the evening? I'll make sure that you have similar wants/needs.
All the freaking out makes it hard to remember why I invited these people (well, most of the people, some I was asked to invite by others).
So, I need to remember that it is a blessing that there are SO many people who want to come and celebrate with us, that it is a blessing to be so well loved, that there are plenty of people who weren't invited who would also have loved to share the day, and that all of this love and celebration should mean that regardless of the niggly little details we will have a wonderful, if somewhat overwhelming, day.
I should put that on my wall 'YOU ARE BLESSED', because I am, and I should remember it more.
I did however solve the seating problem so there will be no more tears at bedtime, no more stressing about where everyone will go - if only 3-4 more people say no, I should be right lol. So please Gods, let there be a couple of people who simply cannot make it even though they would love to share the day with us.
Thank you.
The Universe provides - sometimes we just have to remember to stop and ask it for the things that we need.
And onto another matter: Writing. I haven't done a lot in the last few days, I have literally been swamped with wedding details to go through. I am clear of that for now though and am hoping to get back into it this evening, or maybe after I get home from my step sisters baby shower. I have to make sure there is a decent sized distance between me and the next person on the word count list if I am to ensure I win that muffin lol.
The wedding is now 41 days away and getting closer every second and every now and then I feel like I just can't breathe, like there is no oxygen for me in the world. I keep telling people that I am stressed out etc and they all go 'oh nerves huh?'
No, not nerves, just pure stress.
I can't wait to marry Simon, I am so looking forward to being married to him. It's the wedding I am getting stressed about, not the marriage - the two are completely separate beasts, and quite frankly I would much rather be excited about our marriage than excited about the wedding, I feel a little bit worried about those people who focus so much on that one day when really it's about the rest of your lives, together, as husband and wife. I don't want to spend thousands of dollars more than I can actually afford so that we have an amazing day, the thing that will make it amazing is the fact that we are getting married and we are celebrating our love with all these people who love us.
I have been freaking out about just how many people are actually saying yes to our invitations, I am freaking out about where the hell we are going to put them all, about the fact that we now don't have enough crockery etc at the venue and I'll have to hire more in, about whether I will have enough seats in the end, all of this has been weighing on me and I wished for many things, including a way to have everyone there and yet somehow being able to morph them into half as many people, lol would you mind if i just blended you with someone else for the evening? I'll make sure that you have similar wants/needs.
All the freaking out makes it hard to remember why I invited these people (well, most of the people, some I was asked to invite by others).
So, I need to remember that it is a blessing that there are SO many people who want to come and celebrate with us, that it is a blessing to be so well loved, that there are plenty of people who weren't invited who would also have loved to share the day, and that all of this love and celebration should mean that regardless of the niggly little details we will have a wonderful, if somewhat overwhelming, day.
I should put that on my wall 'YOU ARE BLESSED', because I am, and I should remember it more.
I did however solve the seating problem so there will be no more tears at bedtime, no more stressing about where everyone will go - if only 3-4 more people say no, I should be right lol. So please Gods, let there be a couple of people who simply cannot make it even though they would love to share the day with us.
Thank you.
The Universe provides - sometimes we just have to remember to stop and ask it for the things that we need.
And onto another matter: Writing. I haven't done a lot in the last few days, I have literally been swamped with wedding details to go through. I am clear of that for now though and am hoping to get back into it this evening, or maybe after I get home from my step sisters baby shower. I have to make sure there is a decent sized distance between me and the next person on the word count list if I am to ensure I win that muffin lol.
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