So, I have decided to bow gracefully out of Nanowrimo. I would have to work myself pretty hard in order to finish at this point, and while some people have the strength and willpower to do that - I do not. What I do have the strength to say is that this wasn't a good writing month for me, or rather, this wasn't a good month for me to be attempting such a challenge.
I feel like I have now had enough of a breather from exams and the stress of this years study that I can let myself get back into those things which I love and so the aim now is to complete the smaller challenge of 25,000 words in November proposed over on the Kiwiwriters board for those who haven't had the time for the whole 50K. Seeing as that means only 7,000 more odd words then I should be fine! At least this month I will have succeeded at something writerly.
I have been thinking a lot this afternoon, about how hard it has been to motivate myself lately. I fell into this slump since exams have finished, this little world where you know you don't HAVE to do anything, there is nothing demanding your attention directly (other than small child, but I guess I am just so used to filling her needs and demands that it almost doesn't count). There are a lot of things I want to be doing, but just have not felt motivated enough to do.
I would have loved to have finished nano, I would have loved to have my garden totally in order, to have spent hours getting back into painting, to have done the massive house clean I have been dying to do, to read a few novels just for the hell of it, to get down to the beach more, to exercise more, to spend more time catching up with my friends, to have finalized the myriad things which need finalizing for the wedding... and so the list goes on. But what have I been doing? reading blogs, sitting around, watching day time TV, chilling out with my girl, playing games...
So I guess essentially I have been in 'recovery' mode, and thats ok, but it's time I moved on from there into some other kind of stage - unsure exactly what yet, but something that involves more productivity. I'm going to start giving myself smart, achievable lists of things that need doing in the week. Some of them will be a few hour jobs (finish weeding the garden), some of them will be longer term projects (collect shells at the beach for table decorations), and some of them will be attempts to set up habits (take the dog for a walk at least three times! Write for at least one hour a day).
We'll see how it goes. I have ticked two things off this weeks list already and am feeling better for it.
I feel like I have now had enough of a breather from exams and the stress of this years study that I can let myself get back into those things which I love and so the aim now is to complete the smaller challenge of 25,000 words in November proposed over on the Kiwiwriters board for those who haven't had the time for the whole 50K. Seeing as that means only 7,000 more odd words then I should be fine! At least this month I will have succeeded at something writerly.
I have been thinking a lot this afternoon, about how hard it has been to motivate myself lately. I fell into this slump since exams have finished, this little world where you know you don't HAVE to do anything, there is nothing demanding your attention directly (other than small child, but I guess I am just so used to filling her needs and demands that it almost doesn't count). There are a lot of things I want to be doing, but just have not felt motivated enough to do.
I would have loved to have finished nano, I would have loved to have my garden totally in order, to have spent hours getting back into painting, to have done the massive house clean I have been dying to do, to read a few novels just for the hell of it, to get down to the beach more, to exercise more, to spend more time catching up with my friends, to have finalized the myriad things which need finalizing for the wedding... and so the list goes on. But what have I been doing? reading blogs, sitting around, watching day time TV, chilling out with my girl, playing games...
So I guess essentially I have been in 'recovery' mode, and thats ok, but it's time I moved on from there into some other kind of stage - unsure exactly what yet, but something that involves more productivity. I'm going to start giving myself smart, achievable lists of things that need doing in the week. Some of them will be a few hour jobs (finish weeding the garden), some of them will be longer term projects (collect shells at the beach for table decorations), and some of them will be attempts to set up habits (take the dog for a walk at least three times! Write for at least one hour a day).
We'll see how it goes. I have ticked two things off this weeks list already and am feeling better for it.
3 comments:
Cassie, you've already done very well on NaNo and besides, having that aching wrist can't have helped either.
As for recovery mode, I think you deserve it after so long studying - I'm even going to go into recovery mode after this month is out so I don't blame you at all.
Good luck on the half-NaNo challenge!
It isn't surprising that you feel the way you do. It's like the air has finally escaped the balloon, leaving behind deflated plastic. (Not that you are plastic or anything.)
After focusing so intensely on completing your degree you deserve to take some time to do what ever it is you want. I play video games, play with my cat, and in general veg-out once I've finished a project or some other task that takes a lot.
Take it easy and don't worry about the writing too much.
NaNo is not going to fit into your schedule every year. Nothing wrong with that. You're coming down from a hugely stressful and busy period and taking a breather after that isn't a luxury, it's most likely what your mind and body both need to stay healthy. Just roll with it, I say. :)
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